Evil is a Lie in My Head

Evil is a Lie in my head. Only the Good is real.

“Evil is a lie. Only the Good is real.”

I am the only person I know who believes evil is a lie. Correction. My soul also believes this. In fact it was she who initially informed me. Early on in my journey, shortly after I met my soul, she compared us to a horse and rider. I’m the horse. My job is to carry my Beloved safely home, without fear, to the earthly kingdom prepared for us since the creation of the world.

Her imagery was wonderfully compelling. And utterly terrifying.

Light with Darkness

No secrets. While the narrow road is glorious and exciting, it is also fraught with personal hardship, fear and darkness. Along the Way, the lone seeker will experience the direct presence of God in all of its sublime and troubling manifestations. I’ve delighted in visits from angels, cloud and light. I’ve also faced beings who aren’t so pleasant. The devil isn’t one of them. Indeed, the term “satan,” the original Hebrew form used by Christ, simply means “obstacle.”

There are any number of obstacles to ascension. Some of them are here on earth. Others come from elsewhere. Most reside in the mind and heart. Although bad things sometimes happen, believing in evil is a lie that separates me from God. Evil is not a power unto itself, nor is it a child of the Light. Because darkness is death, death cannot also be alive. A living being must animate it. That would be me. Most of the dark obstacles I face on my quest are of my own making.

Believe in the Good.

The Good is the only thing that is truly real. Along the narrow road, I see and interact with divine beings. I hear from Father, Christ (our big Brother), the Holy Spirit (Mother), and my own dear soul. God’s living light manifests on most nights. I’ve been led to learn how to heal myself and others via prayer and love. Even so, during my journey I’ve been scared, sleep-deprived, longing for a break in the endless legions of unknown beings who await the moment when I go to sleep.

I survived the fear of those first few years. By accepting and loving my supposed ‘enemies,’ and allowing those who want in to come in, I have begun to realize Christ’s promise at Let him who seeks not cease seeking until he finds; and when he finds he shall be troubled; and having been troubled he shall marvel, and he shall reign over the totality and find repose.Thomas 2. Back then, however, what my soul asked of me seemed next to impossible.

Evil is a lie.

“Don’t you ever think those words!” she exclaimed. My soul was not angry, but intensely serious. “You must BELIEVE.” This unexpected outburst occurred during a discussion of my soul’s previous mortal companions, living beings like me who did not reach the Destination.

“How long have you been, um…” I fumbled for the words, “waiting for me?”

“Oh my love, you cannot know how long I’ve waited. So long even I can’t remember. You’ve no idea how many tried and failed, how many never tried, and how many more never knew I existed.”

It was the first time I heard my normally cheerful soul project such a note of despair. Profoundly touched by her tone, I choked back a sob. My heart ached to hear her so. Though not exactly sure what “how long” meant in her terms, I suspected it was much, much longer than my small mind could grasp. I thought of my soul, all alone, calling out to her mate again and again but receiving no answer. I pictured her every thousand years or so growing hopeful, excited, almost certain… then deprived once more of the only wish she ever had.

Wouldn’t I be just another failure?

I’d done it again. I had to come up with a new thought fast or risk a second scolding. “I DO believe—you know that! But I don’t know if I can do what you say I must do. I don’t even know what it is!”

“Yes, you do,” she answered. “You know. Your job is to be a strong, fearless, glorious horse. Let nothing frighten you, let no obstacle stop you, for every fearful thing is a lie. Death is a lie. Evil is a lie in your head. Only the Good is real. You must hold fast to this Truth in every part of your being. You must carry us swiftly and surely home without slowing, without looking back. Do not worry. I am right here with you at all times. I am even with you in your dreams.”

My sniffling blossomed into full-on sobbing. I was just beginning to learn how real, how amazingly beautiful and inspiring is my perfect soul. It would be some time before I gave up exclusive friendships and romantic interests for her, but this was the moment that would ultimately cause that to happen.

Not for the first time, I thought of Peter Pan. The story of Peter and Wendy contains many of the images I was then discovering. I strongly doubted whether J.M. Barrie considered Peter Pan “just a fairy tale.” Like many others, he offered sacred truth to people who love to listen and refuse to hear. Mankind’s Great System is backwards, I thought. Truth and lies, good and evil, life and death—all swap places here. In this world that we humans have fashioned, the shadow creates its owner. With a wry smile, I imagined Pan’s shadow endlessly taunting him as he tried to pummel it. Yes, Mr. Barrie, evil is a lie in my head.

My soul listens to every thought. “Yup, and do you see that even though he was right, sweet old J.M. had it backwards?” she said. “In our case you are Wendy and I’m Peter.” Then she giggled, which always makes me feel better. Still, even while joking, my soul never wastes a word.

“Hey, I think you’re right,” (of course she was). “I’m Wendy! The girl who wouldn’t believe, the little child who grew up, who worked hard, got old and died.”

“But?”

I pondered for a moment. “But I’m also Peter. With you, I’m both—male and female—like Adam and Eve in the Beginning.”

“You acted like Wendy before you believed. Now you are become The Pan, the one who is truly alive and always shall be. If you recall, Peter made Wendy a part of himself after she left Neverland.” An expectant pause followed. She continued, “Only half of you is the person you’ve been until now. I’m the other half, the side you are just getting to know. We were joined when you were born. And now you know me, and you love me, and I know you, and I love you.”

Her fearless steed was in danger of drowning in horse tears even before he could break a trot. But she spoke once more, slowly, with great emphasis and simple words: “You are the Life. I am the Spirit. When we are together, like we are right now, we form a Living Spirit. Through me, you’ve seen that you can exist in many realms. But when we are separated, each alone in our own world, there is no life for either one of us.”

I understood perfectly. The eternal days of Eden. And, when Adam separated from his inner soul, the inception of death.

My soul had got through to me. Comforted, I thought of my riding days. That persnickety old Palomino never knew what lay around the next bend. A car horn half a mile away terrified him because he didn’t know that evil is a lie. Because I was there, like a spirit whispering truth in his ear, Jesse always got me safely home.

Instantly my fear dissolved into the lie from which it had sprung. I became sleepy. Tonight, I thought, I will carefully write everything she said in my journal. My soul will whisper to me. She will help me remember every word. And one day we will be together in Forever.

— Andrew Michael


Image Credit
© Kydriashka | Dreamstime.com – Floral Girl On White Horse 

One thought on “Evil is a Lie in My Head”

  1. Thank you for writing this piece. This is so deep and beautiful. And I love the picture of horse and the soul.

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